120823 Agnostic Advent: Myth #8 "Labels define me with accuracy."

Soup cans need labels so people can know what is inside.  But does the same principle apply to how we see other people?  Good question.  I often say that the soup doesn't need the label, because the soup knows what it is.  But there is this thing called the can that prevents anyone else from seeing what the soup is.  Thus the need for a label.  So using this analogy for humans, what is the can?  Is it our projected self that others see before they actually get to know us.  Is it other's perception of us based on first contact?  Whatever that can is, it prevents others from seeing who we are at our core.  It prevents them from seeing the soup that is us.  

I think we need labels for others when we don’t take the time to listen to their story. Maybe we also need labels for ourselves when we don’t believe our story will be listened to.  But how can any human being  be adequately summed up by a label. When what they really need is to be understood within their story. 

I don't mind some labels that may very well define me by my relationships or personality.  I am my husband's wife, I am my mother's daughter.  I even don't mind the label given me by the  Enneagram… Four.  And then for those who understand the Enneagram I can go into more detail.  I am a Social Four Wing Five.  But does that even define my total self?  Probably not.  Because there are others in this world with the same  label that may be different in a lot of ways from me.  So maybe then the answer is a combination of labels to narrow down the focus.  That can get exhausting.  

So what is the goal of labelling myself if the labels are insufficient to define me.  The risk is great that a label will lump me into a category that doesn't paint the whole picture of who is me.  It's why when I try to tell people what is going on with me, I try to steer clear of labels that they may not understand.  

In the next few days, I will address some labels in detail and how I relate to them.  But for now, I will leave you with this thought that came to me early this morning.    

"Words have the capacity to shape my story and limit my story." 

(written December 8, 2023)